Wow...

I made this blog ages ago to share my short stories and poems with the world.
After a while, amidst the hustle and bustle of every day life, my writing fell to the sidelines and I now rarely write anything new.
I came back here because of a comment someone left on one of my poems and its really heart warming to see my works appreciated and touching the hearts of others. To be honest, I never really thought I was very good *laughs*.
So anyways, I hope you guys enjoy reading my works. It was a pleasure and an experience writing each and every single piece.
Please do leave a comment if you read something you like (^_^)
And thanks for reading =)

Charades [Poem]

There's something i wish I could tell you
I don't know if you'd understand
Its a feeling in my heart
And i've been thinking about it lately

But would you hear my words?
Would you know what it means to me?
There are so many things I wish I could say
But I think it'd get lost halfway

Oh, I started piano lessons btw.
but i still haven't cut my nails
I have a new aim in life
And I think its really great.

I smile a lot more now
I'm enjoying the little I have.
I went to cell last night
we played charades.

Do you know that game? Charades?
I feel like we're playing that sometimes
Like I'm acting out a scene
I hope you'll understand.

Do you feel the void?
There's this big distance between us
Well, we're not kids anymore
And things arent the same

But I wish they were
It makes me sad.
To think I'm losing you
What can I do?

I guess we're growing up
but do we really have to grow apart?
I thought it'd always be us together
You and me, just like it used to be

I guess its my fault
I was never really there
Physically, emotionally
And now its too late

I dont want to beat around no bushes
Dont want no games of charade
Dont want to pretend like its all okay
As it slowly slips away

Because I love you
I dont want you to go
I wish you'd stay.
What more can I say?

Chemistry [Poem]

We dance around each other,
denying the attraction that pulls us closer.
Like planets in orbit,
magnets resisting the pull,
leaves fluttering in the wind,
whispers in the night.
If I could deny you, would I?
If I would deny you, could I?

You spark this in me
Chemistry so intense
It is not that I love you
Not that I'm infatuated
But i'm drawn to you
The way that you are to me
And it scares me

Tell me why do I adore you
Why I look at you with fascination on my face
Tell me why when we are together
Our hearts sing in harmony
Even as we argue and refuse to speak

Could it be that you were made for me?
As I was made for you?
Could it be by fate's irony
That we are meant to be?
Could it be, you and I...
Friends, lovers, soulmates
You and I?

You Were Mine [Poem]

I gave you my heart
You settled into my life
I was happy in your arms
You were mine

You calmed my erratic tears
Diminished all my foolish fears
You gave me a new light
You were mine

You opened my eyes
As I opened my heart
I learned to breathe again
You were mine

You taught me what I had forgotten
That tears dont mean weakness
That I am beautiful inside
You were mine

I loved you
You were my world
I was safe with you
You were mine

Happily ever afters
Forever and evers
I wanted to believe
You were mine

You showed me I could run
That if I fell, you'd pick me up
You nurtured me
You were mine

Then curtains fell
And flowers wilt
Then it all just ends
You were mine

I love you
I have loved you
I loved you
You were mine

Now all I feel is empty
And tears fall so easily
Where is my happy ending?
You were mine

I thought you said "Forever"
I thought I wouldnt believe you
But turns out I did
YOu were mine

Now all I see is darkness
I've tried to live with it
Praying for light, remembering when
You were mine

But I cant lie to myself
Not anymore
Gone are those days
You were mine

So I have to let you go
Though it aches my heart
I just cant pretend anymore
You were mine

I will remember you
For once upon a time
You were my everything
When you were mine
But you arent anymore

Hi, Stranger [Poem]

Hi, Stranger
It's nice to see your face
Havent seen you around in a while
You don't look the same

Hi, Stranger
Do you remember my name?
It's been so long since we've talked
Now I don't know what to say

Hi, Stranger
It's kinda awkward now, isnt it?
Don't remember what we talk about
Now I don't know where to begin

Hi, Stranger
I wonder if you've changed
What if we don't get along anymore?
Somehow its just not the same

Hi, Stranger
I've missed you, you know
You are missing from my life
But you are busy, I know

Hi, Stranger
I still check for you sometimes
Still hope to see your smile around
Missing the warmth you give me

Hi, Stranger
It feels empty inside
I want to talk to you
But you're no where in sight

Hi, Stranger
I wonder if you miss me
Do you think of me sometimes?
Do you look for me too?

Hi, Stranger
So does it end just like that?
Will we walk past each other
On the streets one day?

Hi, Stranger
I miss you, you know...

Rubik Cube ("Story") [short]

No one expects you to understand the things that run through their mind, as refreshing as a clear stream with rays of light that twinkle like daytime stars when it hits the water, as puzzling as a brain teaser, as calming as a cool day on the beach yet as nerve-wrecking as as an important test.

No one expects you to understand the swirl of emotions coursing through their heart. Confusion, puzzlement, excitement, apprehension, anticipation... How could you understand if they themselves don't?

Now that I think of it, its quite like a Rubik cube. You observe it, not sure if you should give it a try. What if you fail? But as you watch people twist and turn it, trying to crack the secret, to figure out the formula; as you watch it, in general, you grow more and more curious and you want more and more to give it a try.

Holding it in your hands, you keep trying to figure it out, trying everything imaginable. Sometimes you wish you could pull it apart and rearrange it the way you want it to be; perfect. Occasionally, it seems like you're on the right track. Other times, you're either totally clueless or so totally frustrated at the fact that this one thing can cause you so much headache. It can reach a point where you don't sleep, you don't eat; all you wanna do is get this right!

Depending on your commitment, your interest will fizzle after you screw it badly enough. Then you put it away for another day, for the day when it's charm and magnetism draws you deep again.

But then one day, when you pick it up again and as you progress, it seems to be going well. Sure, there are a few screw-ups but you don't give up because this time you're gonna get it. At least, that's what you tell yourself. You keep at it, working hard and doing what you think is right, following your heart and also your mind. You keep trying and then- you get it.

It's perfect. A solid cube with a single color on each of it's 3x3 sides. You're the envy of all who's ever tried to get what you've achieved but still cannot succeed.

Then the challenge continues. 4x4 Rubik cube. 5x5 Rubik cube. There's even a triangular one. You progress onto higher levels, onto more challenging levels. Sure it's hard but with the satisfaction you get and the high it gives you, what could get you down from your cloud 9?

A Rubik Cube... is alot like love...

Second Chance (Story) [medium]

18 July 2036
“Oh, this is so exciting!” Anna, my best friend squealed. The two of us were sitting in the park, in the middle of a picnic, watching a live launch of a rocket on my hand phone screen.
“Yeah, it is,” I could feel goose bumps popping up as I waited with anticipation for the Green Earth 1 rocket that I had helped build, to launch into the atmosphere.
The Green Earth 1 rocket is an international project designed by the world’s top scientists and engineers of various fields to remove the threats of the green house effect and rising sea levels by changing the carbon dioxide into oxygen. Eight years ago, I joined this elite team as an electronics engineer.
“Ten… Nine… Eight… Seven…” The countdown began. I felt a pang of regret that I could not witness the launch close up. I quickly reminded myself that we had planned Anna’s 35th birthday picnic a long time ago.
“Sam, you must be so proud,” Anna said as she gave my hand a squeeze. I was proud. Although I was only 27 when I joined this earth-saving project, all my colleagues treated me with respect and my opinions were held in high regard. Most importantly, I had a role in this important project.
“Three… Two… One…” Anna and I cheered as the rocket took off. I felt a rush of excitement; I was like a small boy tearing open his Christmas presents. My dreams of a cleaner and better environment were just about to come true.
All of a sudden, while the rocket was in the middle of the troposphere, GE1 gave a small jerk. Caution bells rang in my head. That wasn’t supposed to happen; something was wrong. The GE1 jerked again, more violently.
“Oh no,” I muttered under my breath. “Watch out!” The GE1 exploded. There was a ferocious boom as the rocket blew up into pieces. On my small hand phone screen, we watched on helplessly at the fiery flames as the remains of the rocket plummet towards the earth.
I felt a warm hand slip into mine; Anna pulled me up from the ground and quickly started to clear the remains of our picnic. I just stood there, staring; I dumbfounded at the sudden change of events.
When she was done, Anna led me to the car. “Come on, Samuel,” she told me gently, wiping off a tear I hadn’t realized was there, “I’ll drive you to the station.”

*

My movements were slow and heavy as I locked the main door and trudged up the stairs to my bedroom. I dragged myself to the bed and just laid there, staring at the ceiling.
David, the head of this entire operation, had told us that it was suspected that the GE1 was sabotaged. On top of that we would not be building another rocket; there was a lack of funds and none of the countries were willing to back us up.
‘Sabotage’. I had never seen David looking so messed up. He had bloodshot eyes, a pale complexion and he wore a spaced out expression. His usually neat suit was in disarray.
‘We would not be building another rocket.’ At the rate things are going, every living thing on earth would completely fried in twenty to thirty years. The entire human race would be completely extinct by the year 2080, about 44 years from now.
“Unless…” a thought struck me. I crossed the room in three long strides to my desk. My heart was beating loudly. Picking up the receiver, I dialed a number I knew by heart.
After a few rings, the phone was picked up. “Hello?” In the background I could here my niece and nephew, Deidre and Daniel splashing around in their pool at the back of the house.
“Did you watch the launch?” I asked. “The GE1 exploded.” Even now, hours after the incident, the words still pierced my heart and every syllable was a heavy blow.
There was a soft sigh. “Yes. I tried calling you a million times. Sam, are you all right? What happened?”
“I need to use the time machine.”
A long silence greeted my statement. Finally, my older sister replied. “Samuel, are you sure you want to do this?” I kept silent. The answer to that was more than obvious. Hannah heaved a sigh. “Come on over.”
“Thanks, sis. Love you!” I quickly hung up the phone and grabbed my car keys off the table. Whistling, I jogged down the stairs, out the door and got into my car. It was amazing how quickly a situation could change.
“I have a chance to make things right,” I muttered to myself as I steered my car out of my driveway and onto the road. “I can change everything.”
“Are you sure you want to do this?” my sister asked as soon as she opened the door to let me in.
I fixed my gaze on her, not saying a word. Hannah knows how important this was to me and the only way I could save the GE1 was if I used the time machine Hannah and I secretly built in her attic; Hannah used to be a scientist before she decided she wanted to be a stay-at-home mother. The only flaw in my plan was that I wasn’t sure if the time machine worked properly; Hannah had told me that it wouldn’t on various occasions.
With another long and loud sigh, Hannah led me to her attic where the time machine was already up and running. To my surprise, there was someone there, checking the dials, knobs and such.
“What the-“ I uttered when that person turned and I saw her face. It was my sister. I turned around and, sure enough, there appeared to be two of Hannah. “What’s going on? Did you clone yourself or something?”
“No. I time traveled,” the second Hannah said coolly as if she was telling me the time. “I’m from tomorrow.”
“So the machine works? Great!” I cried, all my worries vanished. “Send me back to tomorrow. That should be enough time for me to check the machine.”
The Hannahs exchange looks. “Sam, we know who sabotaged the rocket,” the first Hannah announced.
“Who?” I asked excitedly. If I knew who sabotaged the GE1, I could just try to stop the person or find out exactly what that person did the to the GE1.
“You.”
That single syllable struck me like a speeding truck. “How could I have sabotaged the GE1? Impossible! I ‘m trying to save it. I need to!”
“You have to,” the second Hannah told me. “If the rocket launches without a hitch, it ends up going into overdrive. It turns all the carbon dioxide and any gas possible into oxygen.”
“Bottom line is the earth burns up in a matter of weeks but this time it’s because of excess oxygen. A single match will give the flame of a blowtorch,” Hannah number one added.
“How would you know? That couldn’t happen. The system is flawless!” I argued. “There’s no way that’s possible!” I moved toward the main control panel. They must have gotten it wrong. I had to save the GE1 not sabotage it.
“It is possible. Don’t forget, we have the time machine,” the second Hannah told me as she stepped in front of me, blocking my path.
“So let me use it,” I declared. “ Let me travel through time. Let me see for myself if what you say is true.”
They look uncertain. “Alright. We’ll send you forward fifty years from now,” the first Hannah said finally.
“Ten. If what you say is true then ten years should be sufficient,” I countered. A thought struck me. “Wait. If the rocket already blew up, isn’t the earth saved already?”
“Well, what I think is since the present Samuel hasn’t sabotaged the rocket, the event hasn’t really happened even though it actually has. So the person that sabotaged the rocket is kind of an image of you from the future, or something like that,” the second Hannah explained.
My head went around in circles. “So you’re saying that it hasn’t happened but at the same time it has.”
“In a word, yes. That’s basically it. I know it’s confusing, isn’t it?” Hannah laughed. “That’s my theory about this particular event. But as you know, theories are not always precise and may even be wrong.”
“I think I get it,” I said, nodding my head. I stared at the time machine with determination and partial desperation. “Let’s do this.”

*

18 July 2006

My heart pounded loudly as I climbed down the attic and into the hall on the second floor of Hannah’s house. ‘Mom’s house,’ I corrected myself. I had traveled to the future and what I saw was devastating; everything was in ashes. Nothing survived. Occasionally there was even a small eruption of flames.
When I returned to my real time, I agreed to sabotage the GE1 but only on one condition; I wanted to travel further back into time.
“Mom,” I murmur as I walk down the hall towards the stairs. My mother had passed away when I was only eight and Hannah was ten. Hannah told me that she had often time traveled to see our mother and reveled that she even knew all about the time machine and us.
I heard the clatter of pots and plates downstairs; my mother was cooking lunch.
“Samuel! Give me back my Barbie doll!” I heard the seven-year-old Hannah scream as she chased the five-year-old Samuel around the garden. I chuckled as I walked down the stairs and to the kitchen, letting my hands run over the old, familiar furniture.
I breathed in and took in the smell of my mother’s cooking. I’ve missed her so much. I couldn’t wait to tell her all about myself and all that I have achieved. I couldn’t wait to hug her and to see her again, to hear her voice as she strokes my hair.
Without realizing it, tears started to roll down my cheeks. This would be the second time I was crying in 24 hours. I stepped quietly into the kitchen. “Hi, mom,” I said, my voice cracking. “It’s good to be home.”

Torn Again (Story) [short]

‘No one cares,’ the thought surges through her mind as she watched the pinwheel spin. The pinwheel was a gift that her best friend had won for her at a fair. The very same best friend she was in a rip-roaring fight with.
Her gaze then falls on the picture her friends had snapped for her. The picture of a teenage guy she had a crush on. A crush known and ridiculed by him.
She sighs and lets the music surround her. She listens to the song and looses herself in it. She lets it take her to a place where there is only happiness, blue skies and grass the shade of the greenest green; a place where tears and misery don’t exist. Then suddenly chorus jolts her back into cold hard reality.
She frowns unhappily. That song was the song her ex-boyfriend sang for her. The ex- boyfriend she spent the whole night before talking to; the ex-boyfriend she had fallen for again.
Pushing all those thoughts to the back of her mind, she pushes herself to her feet and gets ready for school, the place where most troubles start.
Upon arriving at school, she is surrounded by her friends. Her best friend is not among them. Instead, her best friend is sitting with a group of her own friends, laughing and gossiping.
She struggles to keep the smile on her face, the twinkle in her eyes, the note of happiness and delight in her voice. No one realizes the pain, the sadness, the grief she goes through.
The day is made of blur pictures filled with blur figures. She moves around on automatic; leaving her free to wallow in self-pity and pain.
She looks happy, carefree, and fine. But inside, inside a little monster gnaws on her heart, driving her insane; never giving her a moment of peace, forcing her to make a choice into further misery. A deep, dull ache deep inside her makes her feel incomplete, alone, like she is nothing….
She goes home. Only to be rewarded by the sound of angry shouting of her parents. Her parents who pull her into their web of anger and frustration, further adding the burden of choosing a side when every side is the wrong answer. Finally, she is tossed out of their tangled web, mangled, broken, shattered.
She lies alone in her dark room, trying to make a choice; trying to make the nightmare end. But no, nothing could possibly erase this horrible feeling, eating her up from inside.
Soon, midnight rolls by. The house is still and silent, so silent it sends a chill down her spine. Suddenly, she sits up and makes an instant decision. Silently, she sneaks out of her room. Out into the living room. She walks out the door- and disappears into the night.

Home Alone (Story) [short]

At first I didn’t think it could be real. But it became apparent when it showed itself to me. Oh! How terrifying!
A chill slithered along my spine as I pressed my back against my bedroom door. ‘What is it?’ I wondered. It looked alien with its green, lumpy face and gooey hair trapped within a film of plastic. It had probably disposed of my sister as it had donned on her ugly tattered orange bathrobe. It stood there, staring at me. But as I stared at I seemed to recognize it more and more. Had I perhaps seen it from a movie? An illustration from a book? I let out a cry as I realized the startling news. It was my sister with a face mask and her hair in a transparent shower cap!
I stared at the dumbfounded, and then I started to laugh. She glared at me angrily and rolled her eyes. It was no use. I was laughing so hard my sides were hurting.
My laughter stopped short when we heard three short loud knocks on our front door. My eyes widened with fear. It was eleven at night and my parents were not due back for another two hours.
“Go get it!” my sister hissed at me, huddling at the doorway of her room. Her anger was forgotten and was instantly replaced with fear as she realized what I had a split moment ago.
I started breathing heavily and my knees felt weak and trebly. The knocks came again. More demanding, insistent and much louder. There were soft squishing sounds.
I lowered my hand onto the wooden banister and slowly made my way down the stairs, a step at a time. Already goose bumps prickled up and down my skin. ‘Who could it be?’ I wondered. We have never had visitors this late at night.
I was halfway down the stairs when my sister whispered furiously, “Wait!” I turned gratefully. Maybe she has decided that she wants to see who it is. I would definitely gladly oblige. She rushed down the steps toward me and pushed one of my baseball bats into my hand. She herself was carrying a large handheld mirror she had snatched from her room. I dryly thought of how she would use it to defend herself.
I continued down the stairs with her close at my heels. I felt as if all the muscles in my chest were tied into one big knot. Too soon, the front door loomed before us. I brought a finger to my lips to motion for my sister to remain silent. She nodded her head and tightened her grip on the handle of her mirror. Her features were knotted tighter and tighter with panic and fear.
I pointed at the door and held up three fingers and started to count down. When I folded down the last finger, I pulled open the door and got ready to attack. Beside me, my sister let out a scream and fled up the stairs, mirror and all. I laughed and pulled out some money from my pocket. It was a guy my sister knew from school with the pizza I had ordered half an hour ago!

A girl's mind... [Poem]

Is it that hard to see?
What you're doing to me?
Do you know how much I'm hurting?
Or you just choose not to see?

Do you do those things on purpose?
Or do you just not care at all?
Am I reading you and the signs wrongly?
Am I the one at fault?

Somehow the tears get choked up
And confusion is all I see.
Is it true that you still love me?
Or just the idea of me?

Am I just a toy?
Did you get bored of me?
Or maybe I’m just paranoid.
Maybe you're just busy.

I'll bear with it,
You didn’t call.
I just hope tomorrow
Won’t be the same

I'll live that I didn’t know where you were
I'll just pray it doesn’t happen again.
I wont let it hurt when you don’t sms
Maybe your bill is high

I won’t cry when you don’t show up
Maybe there's a lot on your mind
I'll let it slide, you said, "I'm busy"
I won’t let it get to me

Maybe tomorrow will be better
No, I'm sure of it
I'll forget how many times this has happened
Because I love you still

My thoughts keep circling you
My heart is made of you
Some nights I just can’t sleep
Because I just miss you

When I turn its always you I see
But you're not really there
When there's a call, it's you I hear
Although it just can’t be

When I say things I don’t really mean
You just don’t get it at all
Why can’t you see what I truly feel?
I'm saying I want you still even more!

I don’t want a break-up
I don’t want you to go away
I don’t mean it when I say "don’t call"
Or when I run away

I just want for you to hold me tight
And stay right where you are
I want you to call even though I'll yell
And that you'll catch me when I fall

I want you to show up when I least expect
I want to argue who loves more
I want you to just be there
And to pick up when I call

The things I ask aren’t that much
Though I know it doesn’t make sense
I just want; I need you to SHOW it
If you love me like before

If you don’t I guess it’s just too bad
Because you mean the world to me
But if it’s true then what I can do?
I can only walk away

To turn my back would cause so much pain
But there's nothing I can do
At least I wouldn’t suffer
Wondering if you love me too

Writer's note:  This relationship turned out to be completely not worth it. At the time, I was too infatuated and "in love" to see it but really, if a guy keep treating you badly, it's time to leave, no matter what your feelings are. Even if it might not seem or feel like its true, there really is a guy out there who will and WANTS to treat you the way you deserve to be treated =) Take it from me.